Tuesday, 31 May 2016

That Guy

It started as such a lovely day with mild temperatures and sunny skies. A crank call got me out of bed this morning. "This is the revenue agency. You have an outstanding balance and if it is not paid immediately we will send the police" is not the best hello one can wake up to. I looked at the phone for a sec, smiled and hung up on the caller. 

After coffee and breakfast, I got the laundry down for my wife then set out to do a dump run. When I got to the dump I ran into "that guy." First off I have to say that I don't know who "that guy " was but he managed to annoy me. Why? Mr. "That Guy" was in the process of chatting up the young attractive part time student working the cash. It was a good ten minutes of sitting before I finally had enough and hit the horn. Mr. "That Guy" gives me the look then slowly saunters to his truck, takes a good minute to sort things out then drives in. I got to the entry and the youngster gives me the look then proceeds to check everything I was bringing in. After this, we play twenty questions about where I'm from, what I'm bringing in etcetera. When all this was done I went in and got rid of the stuff I had then it was time to leave. No one around and I sit at the red light for a few minutes before the green. The student then checks my truck and I'm out of there. 

I grabbed a little lunch and hooked up my utility trailer. The plan was to go and pick up the brush that was at my friend's place and get rid of it. Yesterday I swapped out the connector plugs on my truck and the trailer. I checked that the connections were OK and I expected that to be the case today. The trailer lights didn't work so I was at the start line again trouble shooting. After a frustrating half hour, I finally took the connections apart and soldered them. This done the lights still didn't work. So I was off to Canadian Tire for a 12V circuit tester. 

I wandered the store for a half hour and finally found a person to ask for help. I was directed to the aisle and sure enough, I couldn't find the tester.  I asked another employee for a hand and within seconds, he pointed me to the area where there should have been three on display. he looks at me and says "looks like we are out." I showed him the cell phone and calmly told him that there should be three. His reply was " Meh, you know how computers are, sorry." Then he walks away. Right now I would like to bring up a question, what ever happened to an employee checking the stock room?  Well the long and short of it was I simply went to another store and, while they didn't have any on desplay, the guy went in the back and found one. 

So my game plan is first thing in the morning I'm going to check the circuites on the trailer then recheck the grounds. I hope that I manage to find and correct this because it is driving me around the bend. 


Well it turns out that Katie Couric is a lier. She edited a documentary so it would benefit her views on firearms ownership. After being called out for her editing she finally has come forward with an apology. What's that old saying? Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me.

It looks like there has been a heist out west. Better call Sam Spade. Yes, the search for the Maltese Falcon Eagle  is on. I have my doubts that the gumshoes who are investigating are anywhere near as good as Sam Spade. Only time will tell. 

Well, that's about it for me from up here North of Disorder. 

Monday, 30 May 2016

Ah Country Life

Today started out well enough. After the morning rituals were done and this biological entity was fed, watered and had consumed coffee, I was turned into the semblance of a human and I was fit to meet the day. A neighbor came over and we worked on the blades of his lawn tractor. Remember kids sharp blades make the decapitation of the grass easier. It turns out that the blades were not in bad shape the way mine were so I ended up only using a bastard file on one to touch it up as opposed to the full court press of the grinder on both. 

With that little task out of the way, there are only two things left on my agenda, first; go to Canadian Tire and pick up a connector to replace the Chinese crap on my trailer. Then there will be the installation of said connector.

Time passes...

I went into crapy  Canadian Tire and got the trailer connector without any incidents except for the "why are all the other checkout lines moving faster?" issue. I don't know what it is however whenever I visit Canadian Tire once I'm in line to pay there is always some knob in front that has to challenge every little thing. Meanwhile, there is only once cash register open and several employees standing around watching the excitement. The only thing that keeps me semi-sane is telling myself over and over that I'm retired and have all the time in the world.

Returning my little sanctuary I had some water (hey it's hot out) and started to work. One thing I changed in my plan of attack was taking time from my busy schedule and reading the instructions. I used to never do that in the firm belief that instructions were the manufacture's suggestion as to how something should be assembled. Then with tools gathered and plan of attack made it was game on. Surprising to me a short time later I was done and everything checked out OK. This reading the instruction thing I just may do more often.

So with the chores out of the way, for now, I'm sitting at the personal confuser, finishing the blog. As I type this I can't help but think, ah... the country life. Well that's about all for me today from up here North of Disorder.

Sunday, 29 May 2016

Sunday Musing

Every year in spring and summer there are a few days where I regret not installing an air conditioner when we built our one particular harbour.

Last night was one of those nights. With all the upstairs windows open, ceiling fans on high and a fan in one of the two bedroom windows it was still third world stinking hot last night. Needless to say sleep was elusive for me. So here I sit at the personal confuser, right now the temperature outside is in the eighties and with the humidity factored in, it feels like it's in the nineties. Lucky me there's nothing on the radar for the day except putting out the trash tonight. Mind you there is always the risk that something will pop up but one can always hope.

Yesterday evening with nothing better to do than scan the news I took a look at what was happening at the Conservative and Liberal conventions. I have to say the news people who gather this information have my respect (not that much, but some) because they have to stay awake while listening to these buffoons. Take the Liberals (please) and the goings on there. While "Baby Doc" Trudeau was giving a speech about the former Prim Minister Stephen Harper his right hand man Bob Rae was caught making gagging gestures on video. Bob Rae the former head of the NDP who had a large part in making Ontario a "Have Not" province and all around class act... not.

Meanwhile over at the Conservative convention they managed to enter this century by dropping the opposition to same sex marriage. I figure that everybody should have the right to be as happy or unhappy as everyone else. One other thing the conservatives passed was a motion the curtail the activities of the RCMP against legal law abiding firearms owners. Personally I think this is all moot. I know I should get all worked up about gun rights being a firearms owner and all but  in reality it's all moot. One of the largest factors in the failure of the firearms registry was Irish democracy.

 The gang that couldn't shoot straight (Liberals and NDP) refuse to acknowledge that there isn't a chance in hell of total control where firearms are concerned. A lot of people simply make up their own minds to obey or not and in the case of the registry a lot chose not to obey making it way to costly and unreliable.

Looking south of the border I see that the presidential fight is becoming one between socialism and conservatism/capitalism. Mr. Sanders (socialist) is slowly leaving the scandal plagued Mrs. Clinton in the dust to the point where he is ignoring her. Meanwhile the Republican leader (conservatism/capitalism) Mr. Trump is hanging out with the bikers...  I simply don't know whether to laugh or cry. Once again I am reminded of that curse, "May you live in interesting times." Well one thing's for sure we certainly are.

Anyway that's about all from me up here North of Disorder.  

Saturday, 28 May 2016

A Little about a Lot

Well so far the day has been more productive than yesterday. I was up, showered, shaved, fed and out by 11:15 which means, for a retired guy, I was moving at warp speed. I was over to my friend's place and we tackled the downspout problem. 

It was a mess with copious amount of foliage debris lodged in the pipe. With her help I managed to take apart the downspout and associated  piping then clean all the crap out of it.  Normally I would have simply taken a hose and run water down the pipe to clean it but the previous owner had wiring in the pipe to heat it in the winter. Why this was done beats the crap out of me.

I know it looks like a small job but there were to factors that have to be taken into consideration. The first one being I don't have a clue as to how downspouts are  assembled or mounted. The second issue was the weather. Right now it's 86 deg Fahrenheit, with the humidity it feel like 95 deg Fahrenheit. 
What the weathertainers say is coming later today.
Later on there is a thunderstorm warning for my area and I hope this will take care of some of the heat. In reality I suspect not because the weather guys are calling for the same tomorrow. 

Looking at the assorted odd jobs that I have been doing for friends it's rather funny. If you had told me I would be refinishing floors, fixing downspouts or launching a sailboat I would have said that you were nuts. Looking back at the eclectic kind of education I have had it's not that surprising that I can do these things. It all goes back to something I found out years ago. Don't handicap yourself with a lot of information about a narrow field of study, learn a little about a lot. As Heinlein wrote...
While I still won't change a diaper, I have never butchered a hog and I'm not that good a cook as our dwindling supply of Tums can attest. The rest of the list isn't that far out of reach, if it is out of reach at all. Something to think about if you want to be a little more resilient in your day to day living.

Well a cold beverage calls to me so that's about all from up here North of Disorder.

Friday, 27 May 2016

What a Day

This morning found me up and at 'em earlier than normal. I had a doctors appointment down in the city. Relax I'm not terminal and sooner or later my issues will be corrected. The Doc was a nice guy and only a little arrogant as most specialists are. Today I was looking for results and all I got was to be told I need to do some more more tests and the hospital will call "sometime soon. I know it's a bad thing but today in that office when the Doc cracked wise I came very close to loosing it. 

I walked into the Doctors office with an apointment booked and was seen almost an hour and a half after my appointment time.  The only good thing that came out of the meeting was that I really have no life so sitting around for hours on end isn't that big a deal but there are limits. At one point I texted my wife and vented my displeasure. Wonderful woman that she is she calmed me down. It's good that she was able to do that because I came very close to getting up and walking out. Without a plan b that would have been a very stupid move on my part. 

Later when I got home I played twenty questions with my wife then I took a nap. I had every intention to do this blog when I got up but when I got up the afternoon was gone. Oh well better late then never. Now I recline in my bathtub and soon it will be time to crawl into bed. Tomorrow I'm going to be dealing with some rain gutter issues on a friend's house but for now I'm just going to relax. 

Vent mode is now turned off. Speaking of turned off that's it for me North of Disorder. 

Thursday, 26 May 2016

Who says God Doesn't Have a Sense of Humor?

Yesterday was a nice sunny warm spring/summer kinda day. I did a little maintenance on my lawn tractor (sharpened the blades) then cut the lawn. Today's game plan was for a friend to come over and we would service the blades on his lawn tractor. Of course now there is a seventy percent chance we will be rained out but if he come over we are going to have at it. How does that old saying go? "If you want to give God a good laugh just tell him your plans." Looking outside, ya that sounds about right.

Speaking of plans being interrupted a protester in Dublin stood up and started yelling "This is an outrage!" when Canadian ambassador to England Kevin Vickers dealt with him. You may remember Mr. Vickers, he was the former Parliamentary Sargent-at-Arms that took out  Michael Zehaf-Bibeau  who stormed Parliament in 2014. All I will say is balls, they never grow old.

Well as I write this blog the rain has come and it's pouring outside. I guess the blade thing will have to wait. I have no inside place to do the work and  crawling around on hands and knees in the wet grass has never been a fan favourite in my book.

The other day down at the High Park zoo two capybaras got out and are still at large. 

Animal escapes are nothing new to any zoo. Over the years I spent working at a major zoo escapes were a regular event. Some escapes were serious (Tiger out during Christmas treats walk) and some, like this one, not so much. The only time there were problems were when outside forces took an interest and the media got involved then it became a circus. I hope they manage to get the capybaras back before something stupid happens. Sadly when the public, media and elected officials get involved something stupid almost always happen. 

I see that Two of former Ontario premier Dalton McGuinty's top staffers will be going on trial in September 2017 for breach of trust and mischief. With the next provincial election being held on June 14, 2018 this trial could have the same effect on the Ontario Liberals that the Mike Duffy trial had on the Federal Conservatives. Well at least I hope so. 

OK enough of my rambling. That's all for today from up here North of Disorder. 

Wednesday, 25 May 2016

Been There, Done That

A short time ago I was catching up on the action with the Facebook crowd. One of my FB friends that I haven't seen in years is a cousin on my Dad's side. Today he posted a bucket list thing on his page. It was a list of things that are typical bucket list stuff but some of the items actually surprised me. The first item on the list was "Fired a gun" which he had not marked with an X so I presume that he had not done this. As for me I have fired many guns over the years. From the little ubiquitous .22 LR right up to the (while in the military) Carl Gustave 84MM recoil-less rifle and a few rocket launchers (3.5 inch and M72) thrown in for good measure. These days I'm limited to what I have on hand at home for when I go out to the range.

Speaking, er, writing of the range if all goes well I will be getting out late next week (I hope to have my issues sorted out by then) to bust some caps. One item that I want to bring out is my flintlock, yes flint lock. This is one of those things that gives me joy to use because it is simply so very retro as in a few hundred years ago retro. In the past I have had it out and tried to "speed shoot" it. With everything going just right on a good day without any issues from the fates I can get three balls off in a minute. 

On the down side of owning a flintlock is the maintenance involved. Black powder is very nasty to the metal of a barrel so it's clean, clean and clean again. The funny thing about cleaning a black powder firearm is the use of simple soap and boiling water. When I tell friends who shoot about this they cringe. Oh poo, poo... one simply does not ever use water on a firearm you know. The other bad thing about flint licks is that when one is used it really annoys the other people on the range. Flintlocks generate a serious amount of smoke that other shooters find distasteful. Usually by the third or forth shot I have the place to myself. 

On the agenda for today is a little cleanup around the yard and the lawn/weed combination will get a trim. Once upon a time I was really anal about lawn care. Well the good folks at Queens Park put an end to that with the restrictions on herbicides. So now my philosophy is simply green is green. Grass is green and so are the weeds and if they are cut regular then all is good. One other thing is on the list today. I'm going to sharpen the blades on my lawn tractor. The blades right now don't cut so much as rip the foliage which is not a real good thing. 

Before I wrap this up for the day I have a link for you to look at. It is for a roach trap invented by some Japanese. If you watch the accompanied video you will see them testing the product with a sumo wrestler. On one hand this looks like a product that works well. On the other hand it looks like the Japanese have a problem with roaches the size of sumo wrestlers.   Wait, what... 

Well that's about all from up here North of Disorder.

Tuesday, 24 May 2016

Getting Old is not for the Weak of Heart.

I have shelved the range day in favor of a little down time. For whatever reason it appears that my left side is acting up. Last night trying to sleep was a bit of a chore that saw me waking up every time I turned over. Hopefully this Friday when I visit to the doc this issue can be dealt with. Boy it sucks getting older but I guess the alternative is worse. It's kinds funny that over the years I have taken a lot of training in first aid, CPR and AED use. The biggest problem is the information I have acquired is just enough to stoke the fire of a hypochondriac like me. Oh well what shall be will be. 

I'm lucky to have a few friends in Germany. While there are those who make fun of the German language (say butterfly in German, [schmetterling] and see how it sounds) it is very descriptive in nature with a lot of simply great words.  

Irony - a situation in which something which was intended to have a particular result has the opposite or a very different result: The lawyer who defended Honda against having mandatory anti roll bars on ATVs was killed in a roll over while on an ATV. 

Have you ever wondered what happens to a lawyer who pisses off a judge?  

Once upon a time West Point was considered the military academy. Not so much anymore I guess. 

Well now that I've taken Ibuprofen to dull the pain in my side it's time to get a little work done. I am going out to get one of those drill powered pumps to try and drain some water from the spare tire wheel well of my car. Last week when I helped launch my friend's sail boat the back of my car got flooded, hell it almost ended up in lake Huron with me in it. Now there is a smell of lake water in the car to deal with and I have to get the damn thing dried out. I guess the saying it true that no good deed will go unpunished. 

That's about all from up here North of Disorder.

Monday, 23 May 2016

Parts is Parts

I'm sitting here at the personal confuser thinking about what lies ahead today. The weather is bright and sunny, the temp mild with little or no wind. Yes today is the day I will be doing some minor gunsmith work to a new/old rifle.

A short time ago I picked up a replacement SKS rifle that was on sale. This rifle is a replacement for one that is in overall poor condition because of my stupidity* and simple wear. The old SKS had a chrome lined barrel which was fabulous for the protection it offered. Like all things the chrome lining eventually will wear out just as this one did. I checked on the cost of replacing the barrel and it was more than buying a replacement rifle was so I bought the replacement.

Today's game plan is to strip the replacement rifle down and give it a total cleaning to get rid of all the cosmoline. Next on the to-do list will be the removal of the permanently attached bayonet. One of the strange things about the SKS is that it comes with a permanently attached bayonet which is wonderful if you are expecting a massed zombie rush but on a plinking rifle it has to go. Then I plan to remove the front sight, rear sight, spring loaded firing pin and Tapco stock from the old rifle and install them on the new rifle. Lucky for me I have the tools to do all this so I don't have to mule the SKS into the shop and pay $60 per hour to a smith. 

Tomorrow if nothing pops up I will put some 7.62X39 in the box and I will head out to the range and sight the rifle in. Depending on how well or bad I do I may post pics. 

Well that's enough from me up here North of Disorder. 

* In the military we were instructed that because of corrosive ammunition a rifle has to be cleaned three time when used. Once before firing, once after firing and once the next day because the metal will "sweat" residue from the corrosive rounds. 

Sunday, 22 May 2016

Knock, Knock, Knocking on Heaven's Door

The day started with visitors which is a good/bad thing. Being retired means we go to bed when we want and crawl out when we wake up. So there we were sawing logs when there was a pounding on the door. Of course devil may care guy that I am I took the easy option and rolled over. My thought process was it's was OK, they will go away. Then there was a second knock and this one was loud enough that my wife woke up and sprang into action. Up, dressed, visitor greeted, coffee on and still I lay there like a lump. before you think to badly of me I did actually get out and become social. 

House guest gone and now I sit at the personal confuser wondering what to chisel onto this blank page. Well since there really isn't that much to write about here are a few links for you. 

A short time ago I was coming home from doing a little shopping where there was this buzzing sound. I looked around and there it was... A drone. My neighbor was deftly piloting it around his house and front yard looking to all the works this this was as much fun as a person cold have with his clothing on. My first thought was if I ever see the drone over my property there will be hell to pay. Well it looks like technology has caught to the the drones. Here is a little device that looks like it is right out of star-wars and is made just for this issue.  

They are being tested now and sooner or later they will be a regular sight on our roads. The 'they" in this case are driverless cars. I have written about them before and how they will be a major shift in a lot of industries. Cab drivers, bus drivers, tractor trailer drivers delivery drivers the list goes on and on of the people who are going to be affected. One area that I hadn't considered will be the collection of data for ad marketing, insurance monitoring and investigations. On the plus side these companies and their buying the data may bring the cost of the vehicles down. On the bad side this will be another way to track people. 

One thing I have learned over the years is that for every law passed there is an unintended consequence. The Liberal government is hell bent on making grass smoking legal which is fine, but... Due to the fact that the THC molecule is very complex and can't be detected very easily the Cops are scrambling to find some sort of road side detector that can be used the way an alcohol breathalyzer can. 

Well my wife just came inn and wants us to go for an ice cream thus it is time to wrap this up. That's about all from up here North of Disorder. 

Saturday, 21 May 2016

The Day After

This will be a short post. There are many things to do today and stuff has to be cleaned up from last night. last night was fun. Seeing a few friends after a long winter of playing hermit was good, good for the mind and good for the spirit. 

Today is a day of recovery, not that we got wreaked last night which we didn't. It just means turning my deck back into the habitable, clean relaxing summer local that it should be. 

The Jenga Tower of Doom
One of the things that I have to tidy up is the Jenga Tower that my friends left after the final game when no other moves could be made. Looking back I'm glad last night was a relatively calm one. When one of these towers and the two-by-fours land there is a serious crash and at zero-dark-thirty that resounding crash would have had me vaulting out of bed scantly clad with a big stick looking for intruders. OK you can stop visualizing and laughing at this fat old guy looking like that.


So there you are walking down the street and are attacked by a marauding beaver that takes you hostage... Yes deep down somehow I suspect that alcohol was involved. 

Cutting back on salt is bad for you... Cutting back on salt is good for you... Cutting back on salt is irrelevant to you... Would somebody please make up my mind!

Once again we find out that while you really can't fix stupid you can always give stupid a few days off without pay. You would think that a guy like this would understand he has a care of duty but no stupid is as stupid does.

Venezuela's slow motion melt down continues. Sadly it is to the point where even pets are not safe from being eaten. Like Nero, Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro fiddles as his once great country dies.

Meanwhile here at home in Canada with one of the biggest changes to how Canadians elect their politicians hanging in the balance, Canadians want a say in the process. The only issue to this is the Liberals have been handed a majority in the house by 39% of the voters and the thought of a referendum scares the hell out of them.

Why is it that the big guys want all of us to be more earth friendly and reduce our carbon foot print no matter the cost or the suffering yet think this doesn't apply to them? Here is an example of that arrogance in action. Leo DeCaprio flew from Cannes to New York in a private jet to pick up an environmental award then he flew right back. I wonder what the carbon footprint for the little 8,000 mile round trip in a private jet was.

Last, but never least, driver-less vehicles... Be afraid, be very afraid...

Well that's about all from me up here North of Disorder.

Friday, 20 May 2016

Things to do, Places to go...

After a restless sleep I was up early this bright and wonderful day. There are many things that have to be done in short order. The game plan is to take the storm windows down (finally), wash the exterior windows and install the exterior screens. Then bring out the deck chairs and other paraphernalia for people to sit and put drinks on. The chairs, being wood, will have to tightened up lest they fall apart when some heavy lout like me falls into one. When that is done it will be a trip into town for munchies and carbonated beverages because tonight is the night... 

It's cocktails on the deck!

Last year after I put away the uniform one of the things my wife and I decided to do was have a social life. Of the things we decided to do one of them was to start having people over for cocktails every second Friday from the May two-four (Victoria Day) weekend until it gets too cold outside. Actually it's cocktails, beer, wine, pop and munchies but who's keeping track. One of the things we do is play "the game" 

The game we play is Giant Jenga. Why? Because it's just more fun with two-by-fours then the little blocks when they crash down around drunk people. There have been times in the past where the height of the blocks has been over my head. Yes I have some other games like Kubb but these games need to be played on the grass and since we are starting at seven tonight there isn't enough light. By the way Kubb is a great game to play. Nothing says fun like getting drunk and throwing sticks at other people. 

I know that no plan survives contact with the opposing force, which in this case are the fates who will make my day a little more interesting and in a few cases challenging. Well as an old friend from years gone by would say "We shall overcome" and that is what I will do, overcome.

Well it's time to put this blog to bed so until the morrow that's it from up here North of Disorder.

Thursday, 19 May 2016

Home, Home Again

I managed to return home last night no worse for wear after my little adventure. 

It looks like my adventure was a success with the majority of objectives done. We managed on the second day to get my friend's trailer habitable after a fashion. The first night being a little sketchy with no heat and the outside temperature going down to one degree Celsius. I have to say that I'm not a big fan of waking up and being able to see my breath any more. My days of winter camping are long gone. 

When we arrived at the trailer my friend told me that the power and water were turned off by the park owners over the winter so no heat or water the first night. In the morning we took a jaunt into town to get some propane. On the way back we stopped at the office where I coughed up some cash for parking. I asked about the water and power and was told they were on. When we got back to the trailer I checked the exterior breakers and they were fine. Then it was a game of twenty questions with my friend and some trouble shooting of my own with the end result being the restoration of power. 

One thing I must add is that my long time friend suffers from Alzheimer's and is well into the first stage. 

Next on the agenda was water. I got the water hooked up and sorted out quickly enough but the hot water was another matter. The system was totally baffling to me and the guy my friend got to winterize the trailer did a few funky things that I couldn't figure out. The end result was no hot showers and having to boil water for dish washing. Not having hot water was not the end of the world but a pain in the butt.

After some breakfast we got to work on getting his sailboat ready. 

This was a case of the blind leading the blind. It took the better part of two hours at the launch to get the boat into the water. Here we were one guy (me) with no sailboat experience at all and another guy (my friend) with a failing memory. While there were some trial and tribulations we got the boat in the water. Mind you we couldn't go anywhere because the safety gear and some other inconsequential items had been forgotten back at the trailer.    

Time passed and it was the next day. We returned to the scene of the crime (the boat had been tied up over night in an area where it should not have been) and got the little things sorted out then my friend took the boat over to the slip that he had rented for the summer. It was good seeing my friend having fun on the water but it reminded me of one thing, I'm not a sailor of anything with sails. 
The Isle of View II
A few years ago when I was looking at retirement I had this idea of buying a used sail boat and restoring it then hauling up the sails and cruising the waterways around where we live. My wife, God bless her, reminded my that reality has a nasty habit of destroying fantasies. I never really believed her until we put the Isle of View II into the water. I had thought, hey how hard could it be? Well this little exercise pounded home the fact that this is one area where you could write my qualifications in uppercase on a pin head. 

As for my friend, he has forgotten more about sailing than I will ever know. For the time being he still has just enough of his former skills to get out and enjoy the water. It has been said that God helps three kinds of people: fools, children, and drunkards. While my friend is not in any of these categories I only hope is that God would see fit to help him. 

Well that's about all from me up here North of Disorder.

Monday, 16 May 2016

And so it Begins

Well here I sit at the personal confuser noting this may be the last entry in my personal blog for a few days. I am off to an adventure. The goal is to have a little fun and help out a friend at the same time. Killing two birds with one stone as it were. Knowing how things work I suspect that it will actually be a matter of killing two birds with many, many stones but that's OK, I like a challenge. 

If things work well I will post again tomorrow. If not, I will be dead the batteries on my cell phone will have died and there will be no way to recharge them or I will be unable to access my blog account. 

I see that the major shake out of the Panama Papers where Canadians are involved may have started. It turns out that one of the named on the list belongs to a BC Liberal party donor.

Ah Liberals... the best politicians money can buy. 
Well that's enough stalling. I have to go get packed and hit the road. That's it for today from up here north of disorder.

Sunday, 15 May 2016

One More Sleep

Today's blog entry isn't going to be that long. I'm getting ready to start an epic adventure tomorrow. As with most epic adventures mine is starting with doing a laundry. Sigh... This morning I was woke up by one of those calls that everybody loves. The caller asked if this was the phone number of XXX who was a veterinarian. Shrugging off my sound sleep I told him he had the wrong number. Mr. Caller did what most considerate people would do, he...  hung up without so much as an apology for screwing with my rest.. All I have to say about Mr. Caller is that I wish a pox upon him and his household.

My lovely wife went out earlier to fetch some needed sustenance for when I'm away. As I watched her deft moves as she exited the driveway I noticed some white flakes of global warming falling from the sky. I checked the date and sure enough it was the 15th of May. Looking out again all I could think of was "What the hell?" Seeing it makes me think I should go get some socks... No damn you global warming I will not knuckle under. That reminds me, I have to go get my arctic sleeping bag out of storage for the trip. It is always better to have and not need then need and not have.

Here for your entertainment are a few links...

Well there was a lady, ZyZe McCausland, in Florida who was caught for impaired driving. She works as a stripper so she tells the officer to call where she works and then starts to eat her shirt. Why? because Florida... 

A guy walks into a car wash and demands cash while trying to convince teller the potato chip bag has a gun in it. You do know where this was heading don't you?

I wonder if this would also end the zero dark thirty house call asking if you want to do an overtime shift?

Well the laundry calls so I have to wrap this up. That's about all from here North of Disorder.

Saturday, 14 May 2016

Grey Day

I woke this morning to an overcast, rainy windy day. Then it was down to the lab kitchen to concoct a devils brew of coffee. Once that was successfully screwed up (always remember the replace the basket) and the mess from the over flow was cleaned, I endeavored to make a second pot. This time as luck would have it I managed to get it right. Oh it is the little things like this that try men's souls.

To start the day without a cup of coffee is to simply not start the day.
I am probably not going to venture very far today. Possibly just into town for a few groceries and to replace a few sundries. The weather is just plain nasty and I don't wanna go out, so there.  Not to worry there are plenty of things to do around here. I will be starting to get things ready for my upcoming epic adventure this week. It's off to a friend's trailer to help him get things ready for the summer. It will be the little things like sleeping in long johns because it ain't gonna be all to warm at night. There will be the launching of the boat and a little sailing if the weather is nice enough. Should be a fun time. I will blog about it on Thursday when I return to my roost. 

So here are a few choice links for your entertainment...

There are those who favour raising the minimum wage to $15 per hour and there are those who say this is nuts. It all boils down to one simple question: what happens when an employee's skill set is worth less than the mandated minimum wage? To put that in English, say a person's skills are suited to a job that is worth $10 to an employer and the employer is forced, by law, to pay $15 per hour then what? Well the answer is simple, business are not charities and owners will find a work-around.

With the field narrowed to on candidate for the Republicans the question has become which republican lost the most in the run for the presidency? Personally I think the biggest looser was the Republican Party but that's just me. I'm not an American just a casual by-stander watching a train wreck.  

Then there is news on the home front how our esteemed leaders in the Liberal Party of Ontario have managed to not only screw the citizens of Ontario over, they have done it in a very spectacular fashion. It has come to the point where Ontario is thought of as the provincial version of the Maple Leaf hockey team. The saddest thing from all this is, like the Maple Leafs who are such losers yet have serious unwavering loyalty from their fans, the Ontario Liberals also have the undying loyalty of their supporters too. I guess you just can't fix stupid. 

Several times in the past I have written about how technology will replace lower wage earners. Well as it turns out those at the upper end of the spectrum aren't that safe either. I think that this is the very leading edge of the next revolution in the service industry. Oh well as for me, I'm retired and don't really give a rat's ass. 

Now into the world of fantasy... I want one of these. There, I said it. As I see it only three problems need to be overcome, first I need around a half million dollars, second I need a pilots license and third they are not for sale in North America yet. As for the first issue, meh it's just a payment. As to the second issue I can always get a license, how hard can that be? All I would have to do is learn how to miss the ground and not stray too high. Now the fact that they are not for sale here is a bit of a downer but sooner or later... 

Well that's about all from up here North of Disorder. 


Thursday, 12 May 2016

Weaving Weaver's Drinking and Driving

Memory is such a strange thing. It's funny how we remember anything at all in the flotsam and jetsam that is stuck up there dwelling in the grey mist between the ear lobes. A short time ago I was looking at a few Facebook posts when one caught my eye. It was about how bar owners try to con musicians to play for free and it triggered something way back in the deep dark recesses of my mind.

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...

Years ago over a few drinks with friends one of the gang made a wise ass crack about opening a bar. Not only was it going to be a bar but since my acquaintance had a love of golf it was also going to be a driving range. The bar/driving range was to be called... Drum role please... “Weaving Weaver's Drinking and Driving.” I remember asking about the various issues like MADD and he had some very solid, well at least to a guy who had been drinking, answers. 

I am sorry that this was only a funny flash in the pan I idea, I wish it would have happened but that's the way things go. Looking back at my friend it all turned out well in the end. He has a wonderful wife, he does a job that he is damn good at and loves, what more out of life could anyone want. Ah but for one shining moment there was “Weaving Weaver's Drinking and Driving.” At the time this idea cracked me up and today thinking about it the idea still tickles my funny bone. Why? Because it is just so damn politically incorrect. Maybe if he ever retires, nah I can't see that happening. Oh well, it was fun to think about.

So here are a few links for you...

Technology and the advancements that are happening every day are something I have been watching over the years. On the plus side there are the things coming our way that will make life a lot easier. For example the coming of driver-less vehicles, household robots etc.. On the down side these new technologies will render some jobs obsolete like cabbies. One of the areas of projected obsolescence is in government, yes government. Less need for traffic cops, less need for firefighters, less need for government leaders. Hey what could go wrong? 

We find this under the "stick a fork in him he's done" file. I can only hope this is the final chapter in the Ghomeshi and CBC saga. 

I see that one of the major food chains is having a bit of an issue with IT today. Back when I lived it "the city" our next door neighbour worked in the IT branch of Loblaws and if he is still there and not retired I suspect that he is going crazy about now. His claim to fame was that he was the mastermind behind the debit/credit card pay system they use which failed today. 

Then there are the guys who want more intervention by government via stimulants. Well I have made my position clear on how I thing this is a silly idea and why it will end badly so let the printing presses role. 

That's about all for now from up here North of Disorder.


Wednesday, 11 May 2016

Tempus Fugit

Today there are a number of tasks that need to be done if I am to keep to any semblance of a schedule. Yes I know I'm retired what the hell do I need a schedule for. Well one of the things that has developed in me over the years is the realization that I'm lazy. I know it's a hard thing to admit but here I am before you admitting just that. I find that without some sort of daily guide I tend to fall into the trap of "meh, I'll get to it later" and later gets pushed back further and further. Take today for example, the game plan was to have this blog published by 11am which was two and a half hours ago. So as they say... 
Time Flies
Looks like the cops managed to prevent another slaughter, this time in Oakville Ontario. Turns out some neighbors saw some kids with guns and ski masks acting suspiciously so the police were called.  
 "We saw a car drive down the road with someone's head sticking out of the sun roof," said Tara Alpaugh.
"They were wearing ski masks, yelling and screaming." Resident Chris Chadwick said the teens "looked like terrorists."
Yes these kids were playing the Assassin Game with water guns. Oh the horror...

What kind of message are these parents sending to their children? All I have to say is these idiots parents need to get out a little more.  

All those folks who want to be doing something, anything for mother nature are going to have to reassess their thought on green transportation. It appears that green transportation isn't as green as people think. Well there is always a plan B that some may not like and could be a bit of a bitch in winter. Snow tires?

On the the business world. Looks like the latest person to get caught up in the Panama Papers fiasco is Emma Watson. All she wanted to do was have a little privacy in her business dealing and now she joins the procession of people who are being marched to the gallows. Even if she was using this to hide income from the tax man, is it really that wrong to try and keep a little more of the money you earn?   

Speaking of wanting to keep more hard earned money there are more and more businesses that have learned to shift earnings out of the country and save a few bucks from the tax man. By doing this the companies are saving a lot of cash.
Oh deal, look at the time... Well that's all from up here North of Disorder.

Tuesday, 10 May 2016


I've managed to get a lot done today all things considered. There was a few little bumps in the road but all is good. My biggest success was not loosing my temper at people who are tasked with helping poor little people like me. 

This morning I was up early and had the truck into the shop for some work that was done on time, under budget. These are two things I love about the guy who works on my wheels, he charges a fair price and his morals are very high regarding dealing with customers. I have been seeing him for a few years and he has never done anything but right by me. 

Then it was over to the bank and once again it was nice to deal with a guy who is fair as opposed to the investment brokers who are in it only for themselves. After the bank visit was done it was back to base for some lunch and a chat with LG about the accursed vacuum.

So I speak with LG customer service. The female on the other end is sympathetic and has no problem helping me. She is fast to give the the contact information for another place that will fix my vacuum which is good. 

Information in hand I set off south on a quest, the retrieval of my sick vacuum. I enter the lion's den where the not so helpful lady sits at her station. I explain my visit and she apologizes for my "slipping through the cracks" due to the "vacuum service specialist" being off sick. I'm cordial and polite the entire time because they hold my vacuum hostage to my good intentions and I hate scenes like this...

Soon thereafter I am outbound with  my sick vacuum. Upon arrival at my domicile I call the place only to be told by a harsh mechanical voice that the number is not in service... ARRGGG!!!  Things had been going so well, so very well.  It's OK I haven't given up, but screaming at a CSR located in another country is not the answer so I shall hold off on the call to LG until tomorrow.

Yes I do know that this is a first world problem. Yes I do know it could be worse, lots worse. Look at this guy who managed to leave the devastation of Fort McMurray and return home to Cape Breton, only to find that days before he got home his home burned down. Yes it could definitely be worse.

Well that's about all from up here North of Disorder. 

Monday, 9 May 2016

Why wouldn't it be Monday

So there I was all ready to rock and roll, ready to get outside into the bright morning sun and get to work. Chomping at the bit as it were. Deftly I managed to get the lawn tractor out of it's dormitory and into the driveway. Checking the oil all was green as it should have been since I did the welcome back to life maintenance which included fresh oil. Circle check done I hopped aboard and, well you know where this is heading don't you...  I turned the key the motor gave a pathetic little click and the battery died. 

The battery is original to the machine so it is around 4 and a half years old. In the fall I set it up with a one watt trickle charger so I don't have to go through the machinations of pulling the battery out. The battery stays charged all through the long cold winter months, or that is how it is supposed to work. Well for the last few winters it has bu as they say all good things must come to an end.

Well OK then, on to plan B...

Out came the battery charger and I hooked it up. Right now the charger is feeding my hungry battery loads and loads of electrons. After hooking up the charger I decided to have a go at the lawn with my 20 inch push mower. That worked for the first little patch but let us be real here I have the better part of a acre so I did what any brave intrepid sane person would do. I went back inside and turned on the personal confuser to blog about my troubles. 

While I was sitting here I received "one of those calls" from a person trying to impersonate a tax collector. Too bad the good old days where tax collectors were harmed while doing their appointed rounds are no more. I really shouldn't say that because the wife of one of my friend is a CRA auditor and not that bad a person.  Anyway, there has been this scam going on for a while where a "Canada Revenue Agency Enforcement Officer" calls saying you owe X number of dollars and pay up or we will send the police. Then they ask for a charge card. I had this chump on the phone for almost five minutes before he caught on to the fact he was being played. Then I started calling the number back and playing some more. The last time I spoke with a person whose name was "James Brown." "Mr. Brown" when I asked gave me the address of the Ottawa CRA offices which I thought was a nice touch. Now they will no longer answer. I suspect that I will be getting more calls from these guys. 

Now that I have wasted enough time I suspect, hope and pray my lawn tractor will start.  Well that's all for now from up here north of disorder.

Sunday, 8 May 2016

The Reports of my Demise...

Well I have made it threw another  night of chills/sweats/headaches and this morning when the sun arose so did I. Well I arose a littler after the sun but... Oh hell I slept in and got up around mid morning with the flu symptoms all gone. After washing the night away I went down stairs and sorted out the stuff that needed to be done then coffee. For the first time in a few days food tastes like food and coffee tastes great. 

Speaking of tasting great here is the tail of two restaurant owners who were vegans and ran a very successful vegan restaurant. Now if you look back at the last sentence you will note that I wrote "were" vegans. Well they started their own farm and have started to eat meat once again

It took a while for the vegan community to catch on but now the restaurant owners are seen as Mr. and Mrs. Antichrist. It looks like the vegan community is going all "storm the Frankenstein castle" on them. 

Then there were the two love birds getting some photos taken. Who knew that they would be photo bombed by a group of people wielding swords/axes and other pieces of death dealing paraphernalia. Only in Canada...

Looks like the folks over at Facebook are going to support the Republican National Convention and in doing so will support that Mussolini wannabe, Trump. They have said their reason is that they see themselves as if they were media. I see them as nothing more then enablers. 

Meanwhile the Trump-Borg never stops, never gets tired, never slows his advance... he just keeps coming. 

Remember that old saw about how you could tell if a politician is lying... his lips are moving. Well it looks like that was not to far off point. Here is a story that went under the radar, politicians lie. The story isn't only about lying and cheating it's about outright media manipulation, imagine that. To all this is the fact that the major news media missed or more then likely chose not to say anything for fear of retribution from government.

Then there is the story that simply refuses to go away, Panama. Tomorrow a whole bunch of info will be put on line about a lot of people. The tax guys are  hoping that the curiosity of the public will help them catch more tax evaders. The want you to look, find and squeal on. Personally I see this who operation as an affront to freedom. 

The only reason people try to evade tax is that it is unfair. For those who say that the rich should pay more because they can afford to. Ask yourself why would you work harder to loose more of your earnings to somebody else. It all comes down to the old argument that you are your brothers keeper. Well if it's my job to be my brothers keeper what is his job? If government takes money from the wage earner and gives it to a third party as a hand out, not a hand up, this isn't charity it's theft. 

Well OK then, time to step off the soap box and go out into the real world and get some work done. That's about all from up here North of Disorder.  

Saturday, 7 May 2016


Sorry about the lack of a blog yesterday. This old man was (and still is) laid up with an aching joints/headache/chills/fever flu bug. The bug isn't totally gone yet but it is on the way out. I have to say that I hate this. I had to go out and get salt and that damn near did me in. One the plus side the urge to fill my gaping maw is gone so I'm down to 190 pounds.

Here are a few links for you since I figure you don't want to read several paragraphs of me bitching, moaning and complaining.  

If you have ever wondered if  the tax guy goes after the little guy more than the big guy wonder no more, he does. I think the answer to the question of why is easy, middle class people don''t have the resources to fight back against the tax man. where the well-to-do do. All this could be avoided with a simple flat tax to cover all the costs of all three levels of government. No sales tax, no property tax no nothing except the one simple tax from what ever you earn with no deductions. 

Here is a little something for all the do-gooders out there. To the folks who insist that firearms are a dangerous thereat to society I suggest you read this little story about medical malpractice

Well that's about all from me for now up here North of Disorder. I'm going back to bed...

Thursday, 5 May 2016

Things That Go Boom and Other Things to Fear.

Today looks line it will be a fine one or at least it did when I woke up a little after 6. The agenda today is for me to venture forth and acquire a replacement boom stick. I checked one of my few boom sticks and found that the barrel was getting sketchy. Then I looked at replacing the barrel, oh boy... I don't have the setup to do the work myself and the barrel is worth almost as much as the replacement rifle. Add in the cost of a gunsmith and it's cheaper to buy a replacement and strip the old one for parts. That will teach me for putting the boom stick away after a range day and not cleaning it properly. My old RSM would turn over in his grave if he found out. 

Have you looked at your finances lately to see what you owe? Well the good kind folks at the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation took a look at the debt of all three levels of government and it is shocking.My wife and I are on the side of the minority with the debt load we carry. Our debt load, with the exception of our single charge card is zero, nada, zilch, zip... well you get the picture. As for the card we are scrupulous in paying it off every month. I'm not sure where I first learned the saying about currency but it's true. Gold is the currency of nobles, silver the currency of gentlemen, barter the currency of peasants and debt the currency of slaves.

Yesterday I blogged about the tragedy that is Fort McMurray. I'm not going to go over it again since all one has to do is google it. I will say however that the scope of this event is mind boggling. Wouldn't you know that some do-gooders have piled on the environment band wagon saying this is part of climate change? The charge is being lead by Green Party leader Elizabeth May. So here we are, a town of 80,000 destroyed and it's citizens homeless living in makeshift camps live all but destroyed and Ms May has to play politics. It's a wonder that the Greens actually have two members in parliament, one being a disaffected NDP MP that made the leap off thee cliff to join the Greens.

Then there is the other one... "Baby Doc" Trudeau is slowly but surely moving to make himself "president for life." He still will not put any changes to the way votes are cast to a referendum. He is a proponent of freedom but he will not let people exercise that right. It'd ironic that he is as popular to the majority of Canadians as Hugo Chavez was to a majority of Venezuelans when he took power and that country is all but finished. I wonder at the path Canada is traveling along and where it will lead.

A major problem these days is the slowing economy. To boost the economy "Baby Doc" Trudeau is going on a spending spree not realizing one of the reasons we are in this mess is personal spending. 

To get out of this mess people have to spend and a lot of folks are in debt up to their eyeballs. One of the people I was chatting with about this summed it up very nicely. "I like what I like and the interest is low and they will not raise it so what the hell?" Then she went on to say that she had three jobs to pay the bills.

Well that's just about enough of the random thought for today. Now it's off the Cabela's. Until later from up here North of Disorder.


Wednesday, 4 May 2016


As I watched the news ast night the lights in in a lot of areas burned bright well past midnight waiting for the go order to be given, In places like National Defense Head Quarters and on bases in Alberta warning orders would have been issued and received, personnel recalled and O groups convened. All these people would have been getting ready to help with the situation in the town of Fort McMurray.

The latest photos from the town of Fort McMurray show something right out of an end of the world  movie which I'm sure the residents of the town think it is. By the time I post this the town will have been mostly if not totally destroyed by fire. So far by a miracle none of the 80,000 town residents have been injured. Even the political folks are not immune to the ravages of the fire. Brian Jean leader of the official opposition has lost his two homes. Today the weathertainers are saying high winds and a day the will be worse then yesterday. This will all be talked about later in the media in great detail.

Well that's about all from me up here North of Disorder.

Tuesday, 3 May 2016

But It's Suposed to be Tuesday

First the back story... Way back on the 16th of March in the year of our Lord 2016 I took a vacuum in to be repaired under warranty. Four weeks later I returned to the shop to find the vacuum had not even been looked at. Having worked in a place and having to deal with people who tend to yell and make a fuss I am not one to go crazy on the person simply trying to do their best. So I cut the service person some slack and agreed that I would check back in a few weeks. 

Time Passes...

On Friday I tried to contact the service shop with no luck. After a half dozen attempts I gave up. The yesterday I tried again and again failed to reach them. Every time I called the line was busy. Today I decided to give it another go and got a recording that the line was out of order. Fearing that they had folded their tent and moved into the night I went down. Much to my surprise the issue was with their phone and the vacuum still hasn't even been looked at  So here I am fuming... It's not as bad as it seems, the agreement is that by Friday if the vacuum hasn't been fixed then I will contact the maker and start looking for a plan B.  In the back on my pea sized little brain I keep thinking two things: this is the result of being a nice guy and it's Tuesday not Monday why is this happening to me? 

I guess that it could be worse. last Friday a weasel, yes a furry little weasel, took the Large Hadron Collider off line. The little thing sneaked in and managed to step on some live wires then poof he was ash and the LHC was down. The summery listed it as a Severe electrical perturbation.

Have you ever herd some one say "It's better than a sharp stick in the eye"? Well as this child found out it really is. 

It appears that the Ontario media is catching on to the reality that the political donor system works in favour of the donor. Personally I have always thought that the Liberal government of Ontario is the best government money can buy

Looks like there was an inadvertent roadside BBQ when 42,000 pounds of ham went up in flames when the truck that was doing the hauling burst into flames

It could have been worse nobody died
If the fire department could have just gotten there a little sooner...

In Dubai they have just what every fire department needs, a 200 MPH response vehicle based on a corvette. If they had gotten real smart they could have purchased a DeLorean and have the ability to visit the scene of an emergency before it took place.

Well that's enough from me up here north of disorder. 

New shiny

I was going to get my blood work done this morning, so I was up at the crack of nine thirty(ish). After doing the shower thing and making...